Question: Dr. Dobson, are adopted children more likely to be rebellious than children raised by biological parents? If so, are there any steps I can take to prevent or ease the conflict? My husband
Where do children learn to think highly of their mothers? Who sets the pattern for their young minds, positioning Mom as a much-loved and respected member of the family—instead of being chief cook and scrub lady?
The best public-relations agent for Mom—is Dad. Fathers can wield tremendous influence over what children think of their mothers, or of women in general. Early in my marriage to Shirley, I learned that occasional irritation between us quickly reflected itself in the behavior of our children. They seemed to feel, “If Dad can argue with Mom, then we can, too.” I learned how important it was to express love and admiration for my wife, even when there were issues that we needed to iron out beyond their gaze. In short, my attitudes became the attitudes of my children, which I now know to be typical.
In a world that often discounts the contribution of women, especially homemakers, it’s up to us as husbands to say in a dozen ways, “Your mother is a wonderful woman! She works hard and she deserves tremendous credit for what she gives to us all. As far as I’m concerned, she’s number one!”
Kids will quickly recognize the respect shown by a father and reflect it in their attitudes and behavior. It is a public-relations assignment that only they can perform.
From The Complete Marriage and Family Home Reference Guide by Dr. James Dobson.