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December 21, 2023

Building Confidence and a Solid Self-Esteem

What are you telling yourself about yourself?

Is it positive or negative? Encouraging or discouraging?

Maybe a parent or boyfriend or former spouse has beaten you down emotionally and you feel unwanted, unattractive, and rejected. You feel less than.

But that is not who you really are.

Perhaps—for whatever reason—you don't know that the one who loves you most, Jesus Christ, loves you in the middle of your mess…that He knows your strengths and your weaknesses…and that His desire is for broken people to be made whole.

Here's the thing: When you fail to see who you really are, you lose sight of your true worth and value.

Like a pair of glasses with the wrong prescription, the lenses through which you've been viewing your life may have become distorted. And you need God's perspective, the true view, to gain a clearer vision and see yourself as He sees you.

As Christ-followers, we look to His truth. What does God have to say about who you are? After all, he's the one who created you. He is the author of life and truth.

In God's eyes, you are:

His friend. "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command…I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you." (John 15:13-15)

A child of God—an adopted son or daughter. He doesn't just tolerate you; God lavishes love upon you. "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!" (1 John 3:1)

A prince or princess. Because your Father God is the King of kings (Revelation 17:12) you are a princess or prince. You have rights and responsibilities as a member of the royal family—to love, to give and to serve others. You are an heir (Galatians 4:7) and you have an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. (1 Peter 1:4)

Bride of Christ. The church is the bride of Christ, waiting for the Bridegroom to return. (Ephesians 5:25-27) Until He does, we are to make ourselves ready to be with Him forever, not with a Vera Wang gown but clothed in purity and dignity and strength.

The Bible has many other things to say about your true identity and how God sees you.

• You are precious, honored, and highly valued (Isaiah 43)

• You are the apple of His eye (Zechariah 2:8), someone who is held dear.

• You are chosen (Isaiah 41:9)

• You are accepted by God (Romans 15:7)

• You belong to Him (1 Peter 2:9)

• You are loved with a love that never ends (Jeremiah 31:3).

Once you've discovered your true identity, who you are in God's eyes, and choose to live in that truth you will begin to see yourself in a whole new light. Your self-esteem is more solid. And you're better able to handle success or failure, deal with change, make wise choices, and give and receive real and lasting love. Like a new sunrise, your confidence returns.

Don't let the pain of your past define you. It is a part of who you are, but it's not the entirety of what makes you the unique individual you are. Who you once were, or who you are today can be transformed as your identity comes from your security in Christ.

As you allow God to shift your self-esteem from how you see yourself to seeing your worth and value through God's eyes, realignment takes place. God empowers you to see differently, and you begin to act differently. You change your perception, and you change your life.