In your marriage, which one of you is the financial saver? And which one is the spender? And what about intimacy? Is there one who prefers more time together in the bedroom than the other? On today's edition of Family Talk, Christian researcher Shaunti Feldhahn advises listeners on what these common marital squabbles are really about. Oddly enough, they're not about money or sex. Rather, the tension often results from spouses' different fears and values, and that can lead to resentment, bruised egos and feelings of rejection.

When a husband and wife blow up at one another, it can quickly become destructive. A marriage cannot withstand ongoing anger. Psalm 37:8 warns, "Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; it leads only to evil." On today's classic edition of Family Talk, the late Jean Lush suggests that you can defuse the intensity by talking to a close friend, exercising, or even doing something constructive such as cleaning the garage. These strategies will help you to cool off and wisely address your spouse in a gentle manner that will be pleasing to the Lord.