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You Always Bite the One You Love

You Always Bite The Ones You Love


Isn’t it curious how in the midst of a nasty family argument we can shake out of the bad mood the instant the telephone rings or a neighbor knocks on the door?

Sometimes those we love are treated the worst, and kids are quick to notice this hypocrisy. Have you ever been brought up short by a small voice questioning this sudden turn to kindness after twenty minutes of fire and brimstone?

The late Mark Hatfield, a longtime senator from Oregon and the father of four kids, said his wife stung him once by saying, “I just wish you were as patient with your children as you are with your constituents.”

He isn’t alone. We’re all guilty at times of what I call “split vision,” treating certain people with forbearance while heaping contempt on others under our own roof. We assume the worst; we pounce on every shortcoming. We never miss an opportunity to deliver a corrective harangue. And in the process, we wound the people we care about the most.

Isn’t it time to cut one another a little slack at home? If, in fact, we love our spouses and our children and our parents as much as we say we do, one way to show it is to give them the kind words we bestow on our casual acquaintances.

From Dr. Dobson’s Handbook of Family Advice.


Related Resources

The Power Of Words

Think Before You Speak

Learning To Fight Fair

Dr. James Dobson

Dr. James Dobson

Dr. James Dobson was the Founder Chairman of the James Dobson Family Institute, a nonprofit organization that produced his radio program, Dr. James Dobson's Family Talk. He earned a Ph.D. from the University of Southern California and held 18 honorary doctoral degrees. He also was the author of more than 70 books dedicated to the preservation of the family.

Dr. Dobson served as an associate clinical professor of pediatrics at the University of Southern California School of Medicine for 14 years, and on the attending staff of Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles for 17 years in the divisions of child development and medical genetics.

He advised five U.S. presidents and served on eight national commissions.

Dr. Dobson was married to Shirley for just shy of 65 years, and he was the beloved father of two grown children, Danae and Ryan, and two grandchildren.

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